In a society obsessed with staying young, how can we age with confidence? We are living longer lives, and have choices now as never before about how we will age. But what will make us happy? What changes, made right now, will help us to flourish as we age? This book contains lessons I've learned from thirty years of working with older people. I explain what I have been taught about loss, about impossible families, and the important things I have learned about living with uncertainty. Medical teams have not always heard the voices of older people or their loved ones. But if we are given power to influence the lives of our future selves, how best shall we use it?